By your side (Captain America x YoungerSisReader)

"I'm a monster."

Your gloved hands trembled when you tried to take up the coffe mug in front of you. Knowing that it would slip out of your unsteady fingers, you refrained from drinking a sip of the hot liquid. Instead you stood up and left for the roof-deck, which was connected to your small appartement.

There you started pacing up and down like a tiger in its cage.

You were restless.

Ever since you had been reunited with your brother Steve Rogers, who was also known as the famous Captain America, your life had taken an interesting change.

Steve, who had presumed you dead ever since his first days of his new identity, had found you in an underground lab, which had once belonged to HYDRA. There you had not only been held in cryostasis, but also been in the same shape as when he had seen you the last time.
But instead of happily embracing your brother after you woke up, you attacked him and his companions, revealing that you had been more than just a simple hostage of the criminals. Being fascinated by the old stories from ancient India nobody else but Red Skull himself ordered you to be turned into the living example of a so called "Visha Kanya".

Visha Kanyas were said to be beautiful yet deadly female assasins, who were able to kill their victims with just one touch, for their bodies were infused with the deadliest poisons in the world, making skin contact lethal to every other living thing.

Following the myths and legends HYRDAs scientists had put you onto a carefully crafted diet of poison and antidote, not caring whether you might die in the process of their research. Yet, against all odds you survived the tremendous pain and reacted to the various tests. Your body adapted the poisonous infusions, not only by turning you into a true Visha Kanya, but also by conserving your youth.

But all this had come with a price. From the last moment of your transformation to the current day you had lost the ability to get in actual touch with others. Taken in by SHIELD you had to face many bad experiences with that part.

The memory that hurt you the most was the day, you had been allowed to leave the quarantine quarters. Steve had brought you your favourite flowers, to see his little sister smile again. But the moment you touched them, they immediately withered. The gloves you had been wearing at this point hadn't been strong enough to keep the poison off. Steve had tried his best to comfort you, yet you knew that even your big brother, Americas greatest hero would be clueless how to cure you from your "gift".  

****

"Make good use of this gift we granted you, Miss Rogers."

Remembering the words of HYDRAs chief scientist Arnim Zola made your mind turn away from the memories of these dark days. Yet they still lingered around you, when Steve joined you on the roof. He immediately noticed your gloomy mimic and drew his own conclusions from it.

"You're reading my face again, aren't you, Steve? Too bad for you I'm not made of paper, big brother", you stated.

A lame try to crack a joke, that only earned you a pat against the back of your head from your older sibling.

"Stop being like that again, little sister.", Steve replied, before taking a worried look on you, after you both took a seat on the ground and leaned against the wall that encircled the roof-deck.

You snickered.

"At least one of us starts to warm up to the new times."

The brunette man next to you rolled his eyes at this remark, before putting an arm around your shoulder, which was now possible, thanks to a special cloth developped by SHIELD, which was used for all your clothes now.

"You will too, sister. You'll see.", he promised and rubbed your arm.

"Wish I could believe that. The last time we had this kind of talk, was... right before things got messy.", you replied, leaning your head against his shoulder.

"How could you have known? Bucky and I were both off, not even having the slightest clue that HYDRA could use you as a target, either", Steve said with a bitter tone in his voice, only to be interrupted by you.

"Nobody thought about this. I was a mere civilian after all. Neither you, nor Bucky could have seen it coming."

You sighed and looked up to the heavens.

Dear God you thought I don't know what kind of game this is, but it's not fair.

And like so many times before, there was no answer to your statement coming from above. Instead it was your brother, who insisted on getting up and changing subjects.

A little smile appeared on your lips, when you grabbed his hand and got lifted from the ground by his strength.

This was so like him.

Your brother always tried to find a solution and to make you smile again.

It felt like he tried to make up twice for all the past misery.

But you both were to well aware that he couldn't replace the one who was lost to both of you.

His best friend.

Your love and fiancé.

Like everytime when James "Bucky" Barnes was mentioned, your heart stung. You would have given everything to turn back time and bring him back. But there was no place for such wishful thinking. You were too well aware of that.

At least Steve was still with you.

Your brother, who had promised that no harm would come to you ever again.

Little did the two of you know, that he wouldn't be able to keep this promise....